In Marriage & Love, Trials on
18 December, 2012

True love, comparison and trusting God


Don’t we all dream about true love? You know, finding “the one,” getting our “happily ever after” and all the bliss that comes with fairytale endings?

I know I believe in love. I am confident that it exists because of the example Christ has set for us in the way He loves us—His church. I also believe in love and know what it looks like because of 1 Corinthians 13 (“Love is patient, love is kind…”).

But you know what I don’t believe in?

I don’t believe in making the center of our lives the search for a soul mate. Because when we do that, we shift our focus away from Christ and toward something we think we need in order to make us happy—something other than Jesus himself.

Now, let’s be honest for a moment. (You know I love to do this!) I can make an honest guess that close to half of my Facebook friends are either engaged, newly married or having babies. And at 22 years of age and not in a relationship, it could be really easy for me to let that get under my skin. I could quickly become unhappy if I sat here and compared that one area of my life to that of those around me.

But guess what? Even though it may seem to me that all of my friends’ lives are full of joy and excitement in this season, the truth is that mine is, too—because I am completely and totally in love with my Savior, who meets my every need and gives me all of the hope and joy I could ever dream of. And “needing” anything other than Him is what the bible calls idolatry anyway!

I love this quote from a Sunday message I recently listened to, and I want to share it with you:

“But I ask you, what’s your idol?
What do you look to for your security?
What do you look to for your happiness?

What do you think you have to have – and if you have it, life will be fine?
Whatever that is, apart from God, repent.
Repent of it, identify it for what it is and walk away from it.

And trust God.” {Pastor Bob}

I believe idols can include dreams like relationships and marriage, along with any other earthly desires we might have a tendency to elevate in importance (maybe for you it’s having kids, getting a 4.0, traveling the world, writing a book, earning your dream job, etc). I think it’s good for us to have dreams and goals, but it’s important for us not to make them of greater worth in our hearts than God. Check out what Lauren DeMoss from The Full Time Girl had to say about this in regards to marriage:

“God is the end. He is our happy ending. Christ is our goal. A husband is great and a blessing from God, and there is nothing wrong with getting married. I certainly still want to… but, if God has chosen to keep me for Himself, and to be completely and solely His for a while longer…. or even forever, I can be content with that. It even makes me feel special. Because I am made whole, filled up, and complete… and in love with Him. Because, even after marriage, no one will complete me and fulfill me like Jesus does.” {Lauren DeMoss}

Having the mindset Lauren just described is hard—it’s really hard! But it’s also incredibly worth it.

I trust the One who created me and knows me like no one else, inside and out. I trust Him with my dreams. Will you do the same?


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  • Brian

    Terrific post…Happy New Year to you!

    7 January, 2013 at 5:50 pm Reply
    • Jennifer Hope

      Thank you very much! Happy new year to you as well 🙂

      7 January, 2013 at 6:26 pm Reply
  • Calvarine Harrod

    WOW. Stumbled across this article, love it. :):)

    6 May, 2014 at 3:37 am Reply
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